How happy are you with your life?
Think about it for a moment...100%? If not why not? Despite your circumstances , you can be 100% happy. It's achievable , because happiness comes from within. It's about inner transformation, which has to happen before it can be externally manifested.-Gustav Gous
Relationship|Career|Family|Money|Balance|Health & Body|Communication
Man I was away for a while wasn't I? Well like most people life also happens to us coaches and that's why we are able to actually help you, we learn from any and every situation so that we can apply those lessons learnt and help others get through it easier.
I went through a relationship that blew up in my face, changed day job and grew spiritually all in the last few months...
I learnt that it is okay to be depressed, however you must never camp there, get the physical help you need (go see your GP and take the meds, it helps!) and then pray for guidance so that you can learn from the experience. You see when we go through, please note: THROUGH, stuff we get stronger, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Look at it as a gym, you're training to be better equipped to help others.
This is where I feel that Christians or anyone who believes in a higher power has a bit of an advantage over someone who doesn't. We have something to cling to when we feel like we're drowning, they don't, that's why so many end up in suicide or just completely lost.
Okay I know that you're burning to know how a relationship coach can have a relationship blow up? Simply because we don't know everything and we learn by making mistakes along the way and getting through it. I made the biggest mistake of all: I went back to a previous girlfriend (great girl, fantastic personality etc.) for more of what didn't work in the first place. I just had to find out why it didn't work, what was wrong and being a man, how can I fix it.
Well I learnt that you cannot fix everything especially when you're dealing with people. Some people are just plain bad for you and you need to have the commonsense to get away when you realise that. In what sense bad? Bad is maybe the wrong wording but it describe the mismatch easier. If the person in your life is obsessed with someone else, even on a friendship basis, move on. This applies to guys who spend more time watching rugby than taking care of their girls' emotional needs. A relationship has to be based on mutual respect, understanding and care for each other. I realised that when a man is not respected his whole self worth falls apart and then life happening has a much deeper harder impact.
As men we are only able to love a woman when we are respected, no wonder the Bible states: "Woman respect your man" and "Man love thy woman" the two cannot be separated.
The trick comes in that we as men must act in such a way that we can be respected, women need to act in a way that men feel respected and in turn they'll be loved. Unfortunately we all have neat little templates built into our consciousness of what our ideal man or woman would look like, smell like, and even feel like. This template creates havoc when we don't get that exact match, we tend to criticize everything they do say or wear.
This constant criticism chafes until there's a rift formed and then one or both parties blow up and go their separate way. So how do we get past this? Many couples has learnt to look at the things that is more important that actually made them fall in love in the first place, they get to know each other intimately (this means mentally not physically) this takes a few years, so be patient and listen to how your friends perceive your new found love... Yes love is blind!
In the next blog I'll discuss how love can be blind and how to handle the first infatuation stadiums in such a way that you'll have a better foundation to build on or be able to walk away when it's went all wrong. Look out for my next course starting the 4th October and presented at Capitol Cinemas at the Pretoria China Mall on Zambezi Drive, plenty safe parking, and we have a whole cinema to fill so please come and join us! Go to my website: www.jacquesbooysen.co.za or sms LIFE to 37997 or send a message via Facebook or Twitter: @jacquesbooysen4
The course will enable you to "Get a Life" as so few have it, too many people are overworked, stressed out and depressed because they didn't know how to detox their schedules, come and learn how but also to get a winning attitude towards life.
Looking forward to seeing you there!